Welcome back friends and not-yet friends,
today marks exactly 2 months of my time here in Costa Rica. And all I can say is that time has flown by extremly fast! It seems just like yesterday that I was still working my butt off at my local bakery, smiling all day, serving coffee and pastries to customers.. well I’m glad that I am not stuck at that point in my life right now. I definitely feel like I have settled in pretty quickly, I got to know my ways around town, how to get to Alajuela, San Jose and Heredia, how to recharge my phone and pay my bills etc. And now that I am getting better and better in spanish I also feel more comfortable because now instead of understanding nothing, I can at least understand something. I think I will make another post about how I learn/study spanish here.
What I can definitely say is that I have struggled. Maybe even more than I think I have. I have touched upon this subject before but I gotta do it again because I think a lot of people can relate to it. Learning a new language is hard. Living in a completely new country where they speak a language that you do not speak is even more difficult. Living on your own for the first time is a challenge as well. All of a sudden there’s so much responsibility! Gotta pay bills, clean the whole place (although I did that at home too), take care of your stuff while you’re gone, try not to break things etc. And of course working at a new job and getting started wasn’t easy as well. Especially since speaking spanish is kind of necessary for it. There were a lot of times where I felt uncomfortable, not knowing what people were saying, and not being able to talk to them. The fear of saying something wrong or the moment when you want to say something so bad but you don’t know how to say it in spanish. I have definitely felt angry, sad and frustrated in the past two months. And I think that I have shut down when everything was just too much for me. Hearing, learning and speaking a new language can be quite exhausting you know? Nevertheless I slowly started to overcome my fears, and i simply didn’t want to feel bad about myself anymore. Not understanding anything at all continously motivated me more and more to keep stuyding and practicing everyday. I started to ask more for help. I started talking more to people. And I will keep doing that until I can speak spanish decently. There are also some personal issues that have affected my mental being as well, but I keep learning more about it, and I try to work on it. Sometimes it just feels very heavy. Luckily I have my faith that keeps me going.
Gratitude is what I feel constantly. I mean I get to wake up in this beautiful, green country everyday! Sometimes I can’t even believe it myself. I am surrounded by genuine and loving people who make my time here very special. And I am nearly 19 and living on the other side of the world. Damn. I am truly blessed, and there is nothing more to say except that I wish everyone feels gratitude as well. Just take a moment and appreciate what you have in your life.
I am looking forward to my upcoming travels, experiences and adventures that await me during my time abroad and I am eager to learn more life lessons, whatever it might be.
Muchas gracias for following my journey! I truly appreciate you.